from chaos comes clarity

i pour a drink, and think,
this is how it all began...
one summer night
a chance, a flight

this is how i end my day
i light a cig
in my boxers,
i sit and think;
how could you
shrug it all away?

i take a drag,
flick the excess
into the empty bottle
i found on the table-

you fought so long-
did you give up,
or did He give up
on you?

i reminisce,
when did you leave me?

i remember once
when i was small,
you taught me
how to use my words
instead of fists

i've carried that forever...

when did you leave my side?
i could have swore...
you were here before-
now gone forevermore.

when was it that
i could see
that standing there
in front of me
was not the girl i used to be-

but the boy you'd come to love...


for my brother, Chuck,
02-14-70 to 11-13-07